Blind As A Bat…
I was nearsighted, first diagnosed in fifth grade. I was getting in trouble all the time because every place I would go, I would pick things up and bring them into focus. You know how it is when you’re a kid and it’s always, don’t touch that, don’t touch that? It was annoying, and not my normal behavior because I was a pretty good kid, but when I couldn’t see something that would interest me, I would pick it up. So they took me to the doctor and the doctor — I’m from a very small midwestern town in Indiana — said, "This kid is blind as a bat." So it was glasses from that point and then shortly thereafter contacts, when I got a little older and could handle them. You know, ironically enough, I was so thrilled to be able to see, I was actually proud of having glasses. It wasn’t until I went back to school, after getting them during the summer between 5th and 6th grade, and kids started calling me names like four eyes and things like that, you sort of realize that it wasn’t a cool thing. There’s always someone there to pull the chair out from under you. But for me it was a way of life, because to see that well at that point was amazing. Because it was just not an experience I could recall, it had been so long.

Glasses Versus Contacts: A Losing Battle…
At the time, hard contacts were all that was available. Eventually, they switched them to gas permeable, which were slightly softer, and one time I did try soft lenses, but the focus was really out. Soft lenses don’t give you clarity like hard lenses, but hard lenses are much more uncomfortable. Glasses were just annoying. At least with contacts you could wear cool Gucci sunglasses or even Raybans or something like that. Being a fashion guy, it was hard not being able to wear something that wasn’t prescription. And behind the ear it gets really sore, you know. I hate it. Plus the prescription was so bad, they were heavy. So they looked bad, they felt bad. It was a lot of things. I wore lenses so long that I noticed I was straining and squinting even while wearing them, and the prescription was getting progressively stronger and stronger. But the discomfort level was what really tripped me, because I just… I just couldn’t stand it.

Compromised Quality Of Life…
You can’t walk down the street in New York without constantly rubbing your eyes. Something gets under your lens and you’d stop, and you’d be crying major tears and people would be like, what’s wrong? It’s like sticking needles in your eye when you’re wearing lenses and you get soot in your eye. It’s really painful. And so you go places, you arrive at restaurants, you go to parties, and you’re eyes are constantly red and irritated. People always think you’re upset and crying. It’s really mind-boggling. For me, what I love the most is my work, but when I would have to squint and hold things close in order to see… it’s annoying.

A Tip From Kathie Lee…
I first heard about LASIK years ago. I have dealt with a lot of celebrities in what I do, in terms of dressing them, and I was doing Miss America in 1988 with NBC in Atlantic City. The guest host that year was Kathie Lee Gifford. I was assigned to her and that’s actually when I met and became friendly with her. And it came up in conversation that she had her vision corrected, through one of the very first forms — actually I think it was radial keratotomy at the time, it wasn’t even LASIK. And she swore by the procedure.

Thinking It Over…
And then, over time, I just kept hearing about it. My brother married a woman who worked for an optician and she did it and she would be talking about it. I never really looked into it here, in New York, but every time I would see her in Indiana, we would talk about it and I swore I was going to do it. Then I would think, well, it’s too expensive. I’m not going to do it. I don’t need this. So it really wasn’t until the prescriptions started getting progressively worse and the lenses became progressively more uncomfortable that I really thought, I need to look into this.

Looking For Dr. Right…
Honestly and truly, I pulled up the five top people in the New York metropolitan area and just did a little reading on them and called all their offices. I thought Dr. Kelly’s receptionist was great. She answered a lot of questions, and I have to tell you, she was on the phone with me for a long time, because it was one of those things where if I make the commitment that you’re going to cut my eyes, I want to feel like I have some kind of relationship there. So that was sort of comforting to me, that they were very nice and very tolerant — because I’m sure they get nine hundred people a day like me who go, ‘well, what about this’ and ‘what about this?’ But it is a big deal when you’re talking about surgically correcting your vision.

Meeting Dr. Kelly…
At the consultation, he was really, I thought, considerate and concerned about my concerns and gave me all the possibilities. You do appreciate the reality of the situation. He was charming, he was nice, he was well spoken and well read, and we clicked. He was my third consultation, I think, in the flesh, and I booked the appointment before I left the office. There was just that much of a difference. When you walk into an office and a doctor doesn’t even really look at you, or engage you eye to eye, and then starts telling you, "I did this" and "I did that" and "I started this" and "I was the first to do this," and it’s "me, me, me" and "I, I, I," you sort of go, okay, but what about me? And that wasn’t the case with Dr. Kelly. He wanted to know why I was there, what I was doing, and what I hoped to gain, and then he addressed his experience.

The Procedure…
I wasn’t really nervous or concerned the night before. Then, that day, the two people who assisted him in the procedure were great. They kept asking if everything was all right, kept reassuring and comforting me throughout. And it really is a very quick process for the most part. It takes more time to sort of set it up. And I also liked the fact that he checked and rechecked and then checked again to make sure that he was doing what needed to happen. I wouldn’t call it painful, I would call it uncomfortable.

Nearly Instant Gratification…
As for the eyes, I thought it was amazing that I could go into that office and walk out several hours later — and I did not have anybody pick me up, good, bad, or indifferent, because I live four blocks from the office — then head up Lexington Avenue and see! Oh, it was amazing. My surgery was supposed to be at six, but it ended up being at eight because they were a little bit behind. I went home, and the painkiller was kicking in big time, so I went to bed. But I remember waking up the next morning and thinking that I was still dreaming because when I opened up my eyes, everything was so clear. I actually thought that maybe I’d fallen asleep with my lenses in, which with hard lenses is a big deal because they go way back in the eyes and it’s a nightmare. And I remember opening the blinds and going, "Shit, I can see the mortar between the bricks. I can see the veins on the leaves on the tree. This is amazing. Look at that, look at that." It was unbelievable. I don’t think I’d ever seen like that. So, for me, it was really a miracle. To me, you know, my first real thought was that this is what technology should be used for, you know, instead of blowing people up, it should be fixing people, because this is amazing.

A Sharp New Outlook On Life And Work…
At my office, they always say I can hear a whisper in the back. My staff doesn’t really get much on me. And all of a sudden I would be at one end of the showroom, and I could see the details that were going on in a fitting down at the other end. And I didn’t even think about it, I would just say, "That button is crooked," you know, or something like that. Or "The left shoulder looks higher than the right." And my staff would go, "You can see that?!" It got to be a joke. You have bionic ears and now you have bionic eyes?! Oh, Christ. We’re screwed. But it’s great, because I really can.

Mild Nighttime Blurriness…
In Times Square, where they have major, major lights like that at night, I do get a little blurry sometimes. But I’d rather take a little blurriness at night in the middle of Times Square than complete darkness because you can’t see. I mean, you go out with friends and if your lenses have been in since six or seven that morning and it’s nine o’clock that night, it’s like you just wanted to scratch, you know. It was an awful feeling. And so you’d find yourself rubbing your eyes, and what it does is send people the message that you’re bored. It wasn’t boredom at all. It was discomfort. But it was very difficult for them to understand. So it’s great now. It’s one o’clock in the morning and I’m still going strong. It’s not a problem.

The Bottom Line…
I just think my work is more joyful for me — and, I mean, I know that sounds kind of bogus but it really is, because I love what I do and to be able to just glance and see it, boom, crystal clear, and make a decision, boom, without having to strain to see, it’s great. The procedure was very efficient and effective and it works. I mean… it’s just a great thing.